A Watered Garden
Photo by Emily Flaherty
“And the LORD will continually guide you, And satisfy your desire in scorched places, And give strength to your bones; And you will be like a watered garden'” (Isaiah 58:11).
As I pressed down again and again on the lever of the water well, I was reminded of St. Teresa of Avila’s comparison of a watered garden to the progression of intimacy with Jesus in prayer. When first beginning discipleship, we come to prayer as if to a water well. After some time, this well becomes a water wheel, where we receive God’s graces more easily. Then our souls receive His grace as if from a river that flows through the garden of our souls. Finally, we come to prayer with no effort made on our part but only to receive grace like water being rained upon us. As we learn to let go of attachment to sin, there is more room for the Master Gardener to place Himself within us to do more of the heavy work. Gradually, as our union with Him deepens, it is He Who lives and works in and through us.
Never before had St. Teresa’s teaching been so applicable as I went about the process of watering a garden from a well. How truly she described the laborious efforts of walking to and from the water well, quickly draining the watering can, only to repeat the process again. As the morning sun rapidly became hotter and hotter, I found myself becoming increasingly bitter at the toil without satisfaction. I thought to myself, This analogy would be better if I got to drink from this well each time I came to it, but rather, it seems that I work without the satisfaction of my thirst being quenched. I work only to get more tired.
Amidst my bitterness, my brother came to approach me, offering a hat to give some shade and lighten the burden. I gladly accepted and found myself grateful, realizing that when we begin to grow bitter, it is helpful to remember that we are cared for. This reality falls like fresh dew upon the hot ground of our souls. We realize that, as much as we are called to labor in the vineyard, we do not labor alone. Discouragement comes from trying to lift more than He is asking of us, from even thinking He would ask us to lift something on our own. Rather, we have each other for help and encouragement along the way.
Not only had I lost sight of those around me amidst my labor but I also lost sight of the Goal - Jesus Christ. In looking at my own sufferings, I forgot that my sufferings had a focus and an orientation, that each step forward amidst the heat was a step toward Someone Beautiful. I realized that we need to focus much less on our own efforts and more on the end goal, which is Jesus Christ Himself. Had I just looked around at the beauty of the garden or at the Lover right with me, my heart would immediately have received encouragement. It is in remaining in this vision that our joy remains.
And then my heart caught sight of a profound hope which made my heart leap with yearning and consolation – My Love, approaching to water my soul Himself with His divine watering can. How much I yearn to simply receive the delight of His approach. It is then that I remember His words to me: “It is not you who chose Me but I who chose you and appointed you to bear fruit that will remain” (John 15:16).
If prayer becomes simply my efforts without receptivity, I labor in vain. It is then that I go to and from the well without any water to drink. Yet if I allow myself to sit and rest after the labor, I begin to receive the water for which I have come to the well. And when it is dry and my efforts seem to yield no fruit, it is then that I return to the realization of my need for God, that without Him, I can do nothing. It is then that I learn complete dependence on Him.
A fellow Christian reminded me the other day that the well has continually been a place where spouses meet. There’s Rebecca and Isaac, Jacob and Rachel, and finally, the woman at the well who meets Jesus, the Spouse of all souls. In prayer, we go to meet the Spouse of our souls and to drink from His eternal well.
It was a Saturday evening as I approached the garden yet again after a long, hot summer day. The garden had not yet been watered that day. Tomorrow would be Sunday, and I would not water the garden again. As I picked up the can to only water those plants that were most desperate, another brother of mine told me to let the garden be. I set the can down after only watering a few, still concerned for how the plants would fair through the next summer day without water. As I went to bed that night, a brilliant downpour swept over the land, and I smiled, thinking of the garden, only later to make the connection of what God had done. Let us learn to go at His pace, no longer working when He invites us to set down our watering cans, so as to fully receive Him coming to water us like rain.
Scripture for Reflection:
John 15
Isaiah 58:11
