The Convict

Photo by Hasan Almasi

I’m handing over, one by one, all of my weapons, and most of them are weapons of self-destruction. They’re the lies I’ve buried myself under like a seed buried under rocky soil. I have not born good fruit from these lies. 

One by one, I lay them on the table before me. In front of me stands a man, but instead of one who would condemn me, this man acts as my lawyer. He fights for me. He is on my side. He looks at these weapons and then up at my face with both pain and compassion in His eyes. Most of His pain comes from seeing how I hurt myself, how I traded in the truth for these lies about my identity. 

Today, I trade them back in. Today I give back all the lies I took without ever having the right to take them. These lies are not mine, and this body, this soul that I’ve hurt in the process, was given to me as land is given to a steward to take care of.

I hand in the lies one by one:

I am not good enough. 

I am not a good disciple.

I don’t belong here because I don’t measure up against the people around me.

After I’ve turned every lie in, the man looks at me and says, “You are worthy,” and He takes every instrument of self-destruction from the table. 

Suddenly, this man looks more familiar than before. I look around myself and see pictures of Him on the walls, marking the way He walked to His own death. 

Was this man a convict, too? 

I see in these pictures how the weapons I used against myself were used against Him. This man knows my pain. That look before was a look far deeper than I first knew. 

I turn to Him and realize He has been silently watching me the whole time. 

He turns to open the door, gestures the way, and says, “You’re free.” I notice a wound on his wrist, one of the wounds I know. 

I came into the room dragging chains around my feet and cuffs around my hands, but I look down to find they are no longer there. 

Falling at his feet, I ask Him, “What can I do to thank you?!”

He looks at me with love blazing in His eyes.

“Come follow Me.” 

Scripture for Reflection:

The Parable of the Sower (Mattew 13:1-23)

The Parable of the Talents (Matthew 25:14-30)

“Now two others, both criminals, were led away with him to be executed…‘We have been condemned justly, for the sentence we received corresponds to our crimes, but this man has done nothing criminal…Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.’ He replied to him, ‘Amen, I say to you, today you will be with me in Paradise.” (Luke 23:32, 41-43)

“He was pierced for our sins, crushed for our iniquity. He bore the punishment that makes us whole, by his wounds we were healed.” (Isaiah 53:5)